attention

in another life we could have fallen in love. i would look at you from the passenger seat and- you wouldn't be any different - rambling conversation that I struggle to keep up with - laughs so loud they rattle my brain - hugs too tight but not tight enough - your eyes still dart down when my top is cut low - your hand still lingers at the small of my back - your tongue might not be so quick to bite at my expense - words torn up with soft glances - kisses on a sigh - but the wit and the flames wouldn't die so easily i'm sorry it won't work out, in this lifetime or the next - it's entirely my fault - i wish i could be that for you - her for you - us - a version bathed in silk - the flashback montage of the Dead Sad Wife - the broken-spined novel telling teens how to love - the spiralling of who are you and who am i and why are we and - i turn up the volume on the radio - you tell me about the girl you fucked last night.

~

Another Escapril poem. This year I'll share them closer to the actual month. This one is an unfamiliar, deeper look into my actual life and not just some made-up aesthetic-adjacent nonsense. If you can figure out the context, well done, gold star. If not, oh well, it must remain a mystery forevermore.

~ C x